poem – Brinkinfield

Pink Cardigan Man

The man in the pink cardigan
knew his mission in life was to run
But his knobbly knees
and excessive liking for cheese
meant he sweat’d way too much in the sun

Another, Banana

“A banana requires no knife
to split open.”
I said to my wife

But the look cast
within her eyes
brought forth an uneasy surprise

“What did you give up for lent?”
I asked, in an attempt
to thwart ill intent

My Life, Now.

I asked, “Exactly, how did my penis become
so utterly ugly,
gnarled, knobbly,
and a lot less fun?”

“With age.”
Said the wise old, medicine woman sage,
pointing and waving her shillelagh
between my crossed legs
sat in front of her

Tina Says I’m Pretty!

All my days self-conscious
by this out-sized head
to duck unkind attention
I’d dye my hair red

Cat and Bat Synergy

A cat
Would never wear a hat,
As a bat
Chooses not to initiate chat.

Buses For Women, By Women.

We’re women and we’re bus drivin’,
around your neighbourhood.
We only take aboard women (and girls),
is that clearly understood?

Suddenly

Scientist:
"Listen Doctor Wong,
You've got it all wrong.
No benefits are gained from 'Chinese medicine' concoctions."

Doctor:
"Blue-eyes, I object.
Counter, in effect.
Our recipes are handed down through generations."

Scientist:
"Maybe as you say,
But Mao Zedong had his way,
in 1950 driving forward their popularisation."

Doctor:
"Young scientist, think you're hip?
Well, just you regain your grip!
To suggest political necessity and conniving motivation!"